March 17, 2026

Even Strong People Wonder if They Belong - with Special Guests Charlie Sattler and Liz Malmberg

Even Strong People Wonder if They Belong - with Special Guests Charlie Sattler and Liz Malmberg
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Season 7

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 In this episode, we explore imposter syndrome, its impact on capable individuals, and strategies to overcome self-doubt. Guests share personal stories, insights on humility, and practical advice for embracing authenticity and growth.


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00:00:01.600 --> 00:00:13.519
I never really thought about what we're talking about today until my friend Dorinda Moss mentioned it in her appearance on Cowboys Not Eggheads in an episode called I Just Didn't Know About Life, Enough About Life to Be Afraid.

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But here was someone who I personally viewed, my friend Dorinda, as a rock star of a colleague who had just went on to get a big gig on a presidential campaign.

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And she admitted that she had imposter syndrome.

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And I that's that's not anything I've ever thought about before.

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Um and I thought it was a really good topic.

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And I started thinking about it, Mike, I've I've suffered from this all my life.

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I think most of us uh have had a moment in life where we quietly think to ourselves, what am I doing here?

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Um you get the promotion, you get invited into a room with people you respect, you're you're asked to lead, to coach, to perform, and somewhere in the back of your mind, a voice says, They're going to figure out that I don't belong here.

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Um, and this is what psychologists call the imposter syndrome.

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It's a persistent feeling that your success is somehow undeserved, that you're fooling everyone around you, and sooner or later you'll be exposed as a fraud.

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What's interesting is that it rarely happens to people who are actually unqualified.

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In fact, it tends to show up more often in people who are capable, driven, and pushing themselves into new territory, into new territory.

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Today we're talking about that feeling and uh the moments when you step into something bigger than you thought you were ready for, the voice in your head that always says that you're not good enough, and the decisions to move away anyway, or to move forward anyway.

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So, joining me today are two coaches uh at my gym who a lot of people look up to.

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Uh imagine that we're having people from CrossFit Kinesis on my podcast.

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It's some it's shocking, isn't it?

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But they're new people, they're not repeats, they're new people.

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Uh Charlie or Charlie Sattler and Liz Malmberg.

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Um, what most people probably don't realize that even strong, capable people have moments where they wonder if they belong.

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Uh I I did uh something on the show uh that I've never done before, and that is to kind of do an open casting call on social media to see, hey, who would like to talk about this?

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And these two uh ladies raised their hand.

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And so here we are.

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I wouldn't say I raised my hand.

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Yes, you did.

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You said no, that's me.

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I said I I could talk about it, but I don't do podcasts, something like that.

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But here I am.

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Right.

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When I asked you on the pod to be on the podcast, your first thought was what was the first thought that went through your mind?

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No, no, I don't do podcasts, I don't do microphones, I don't do cameras.

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All this is But you did say that you understand imposter syndrome.

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I did, yes.

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Correct.

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And so there was a little part of you that maybe wanted to talk about it.

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Sure.

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Without a microphone.

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Without a microphone.

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Okay.

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But here we are.

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So here we are.

00:03:14.479 --> 00:03:14.719
Yeah.

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Here we are.

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Um did did you so what was the little voice in your head that said, I don't do microphones?

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I don't understand.

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Tell me.

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Oh gosh.

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Um, I don't know.

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I just don't like attention on me.

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Um which makes coaching an interesting choice.

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I understand that.

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Um but I guess I don't feel like the attention is on me when I'm coaching.

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You're not when you're when you walk into a room of people, it's not I'm the same way.

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If you walk into a room of people, like a party, like you gotta go to this party.

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Like I don't I don't like going to parties.

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Yeah, I mean um even when I drank, I didn't like going to parties.

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Um maybe that's why I did drank, because I had to go to parties.

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But anyway, uh if you go into a crowded room that you're supposed to be at or expected to be at or whatever, where do you where are you at in that room?

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Like physically?

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Yeah.

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Like where would I put myself?

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Yeah.

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Um, I would probably put myself in the corner, like not in the middle of the room by the door.

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I'm always the closest space to the door.

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It doesn't look rude.

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Yeah.

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Now, Liz, I don't think Liz what are you, where are you at in that party?

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Oh, I'm up against a wall in the back.

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Oh really?

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See, I would fix you I was more of a center person.

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Like our friend Jeff, where's he gonna be?

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Right in the middle.

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Oh, he'll be in the middle.

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Right in the middle, baby.

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And I'll be against the wall laughing at everything that he's doing.

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Right.

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Yeah.

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Right.

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Yeah, I'm the same as Charlie.

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I it's very weird to be a coach because I don't like the attention on me.

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I don't like people looking at me.

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I don't like people focused on me.

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So when you have to demo a movement, it's like, gosh, they're watching.

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So yeah, it's that's it was very hard to overcome that.

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So you guys do feel that voice is a voice uh as a coach then?

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Oh, for sure.

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All the time.

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That's that's crazy.

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Um I mean, it's hard, it's it's it is, it's it's it's isn't that insane?

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It's a crazy to me because when you're a coach, you might have uh 30 people in class, and 30 people are looking at you.

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Have you ever done any public speaking?

00:05:21.759 --> 00:05:22.079
No.

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I I avoid it with well, I mean, one time for church, and I did not want to.

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How many people were there?

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Um, that was just for our women's ministry.

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Um, but gosh, it was probably it was a lot of women, maybe a hundred or more.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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I I think the most I've ever spoken to was probably five or six hundred.

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Oh my goodness.

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Yeah.

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Yeah.

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My dad's funeral was one of them.

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And then I used to be in politics and I spoke to a meeting of probably five or six hundred people.

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Scared to death, sweaty palms, all of it.

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And for the same reason, I just I don't want to be the center of attention.

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I just and and uh even in my career, which was politics, a lot of times a lot of people are they are very driven to be center of the attention.

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Look at me, look at me.

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But I never I always wanted to be the guy that like no one knew what I was doing.

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Yeah, I was doing a lot, trust me, but nobody, I just didn't want anybody to know what I was doing.

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So crazy.

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So when do you when do you and I have I have to think and I'll answer these questions too, most of them.

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What was the first time you remember thinking I don't belong here?

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I'll start.

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Okay.

00:06:40.480 --> 00:06:42.000
Charlie's just looking at me.

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Um for me, it was probably.

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I mean, I have to you have you really have to think about these the answers to these because you really have to dig a little bit.

00:06:50.639 --> 00:06:56.399
Um but for me, it was probably when I went went to high school, um, I went to a private high school.

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So I most I'm from Valentine, Nebraska, and most people went to Valentine High School.

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And so I would have, you know, I'd know everybody that was there and so forth.

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But um, my parents and I made the decision that I would go to a private high school called Mount Michael, which is not very far from here, ironically.

00:07:14.959 --> 00:07:22.160
Um, but I was 300 miles away from school, and it was a Catholic school, and I was not from Omaha.

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Well, everybody goes to Mount Michael's Catholic, and everybody goes to Mount Michael's from Omaha.

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So felt like a complete outsider, a complete imposter.

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I guarantee I was the only kid in my class in 1982 wearing Wrangler jeans.

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Um and it it it it it's it has stuck with me throughout my life, I think.

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Um getting advanced quickly in my my career.

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I never I never thought that I deserved it.

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Um one of my biggest breaks in my career was this I was a I was a finance director for the Nebraska Republican Party for a number of years, and right before I got married, I got this call.

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And it was basically uh the the guy from the the executive director of the Pennsylvania Republican Party.

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Now that's that's we're going from like the 35th largest party to the fifth largest party uh organization in the country.

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I mean, so it's a big deal.

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So the number, you know, as a finance director, my job was to fundraise.

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So responsible for raising a half a million dollars a year to, you know, eight or ten million dollars a year, whatever.

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And I got hired at this job, and the guy later told me, I and I asked him, like, how did you even find me?

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Like, you know, and he said that he made three phone calls and asked these three individuals who are national operatives, like, who is the best finance director available in the country right now?

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And they all said Sam Fisher.

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Wow.

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And it's just, it's I just never ever saw myself that way.

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So um, there you go.

00:09:09.039 --> 00:09:11.679
So, Liz, we'll let you answer first.

00:09:11.919 --> 00:09:12.080
Okay.

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When was the first time you remember thinking I don't belong here?

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So a little bit of my background to kind of help explain it.

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Um, my parents divorced when I was very, very little.

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And so I grew up um with my stepmom and my biological father.

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And um, my stepmom was not a nice woman to me, um, and kind of raised me to think that I wasn't good enough and that I was I didn't deserve things.

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So it was There was an outside voice.

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There was an out there was a very loud, yeah, very loud outside voice.

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And so that then became my inner voice.

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Um, and I carried that with me pretty much as I grew up.

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Um, anything that I participated in.

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So in high school, I was in, I was on the flag line with the marching band.

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I did Winter Guard.

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Um, and I was really good at it, but I didn't see that.

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I would go outside and I would practice for hours and hours and hours and hours because I just didn't think I was good enough.

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But my coaches would always put me in the front or have me do solos, but I still wouldn't think I was good enough.

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So I would go outside and practice and practice and practice.

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Um and I worked really, really hard, but never took credit for the what I was doing.

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I just I just did it.

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Um not liking attention on attention on yourself.

00:10:30.879 --> 00:10:31.440
You're on the field.

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Thankfully, there's, you know, hundreds of other people on the field with you.

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So kind of gave me a little bit of a cushion there.

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So that was really kind of my first taste of I felt like I was an imposter is anytime I was put on display like that by my coaches.

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Um, and then even in college, I was on the flag line at UNL, um, marched for the Husk Cornusker marching band.

00:10:57.039 --> 00:11:00.399
Um, and I got a leadership position my senior year.

00:11:00.639 --> 00:11:01.519
So I was a leader.

00:11:01.840 --> 00:11:02.159
Big deal.

00:11:02.399 --> 00:11:03.120
Big deal.

00:11:03.360 --> 00:11:10.720
Um I out of all of the girls that were on that squad, I don't know why or how I got picked, but I did.

00:11:10.799 --> 00:11:11.840
So I was a captain.

00:11:11.919 --> 00:11:16.720
I was a co-captain with another gal on our senior year and led the squad that year.

00:11:16.879 --> 00:11:21.200
Um, and felt like I was out of place the entire time.

00:11:21.679 --> 00:11:25.120
Even though I had been doing it for however many years, eight years.

00:11:25.279 --> 00:11:28.320
So anybody else know that you felt that way at the time?

00:11:28.799 --> 00:11:30.240
Should I let him in on the secret?

00:11:30.480 --> 00:11:31.200
Just my mom.

00:11:31.440 --> 00:11:35.120
I never, I never probably never have let out the secret.

00:11:35.440 --> 00:11:44.639
Yeah, I didn't really the people I tell or that I talk to about that insecurity are usually my parents or right now my husband.

00:11:44.720 --> 00:11:55.200
Um, he knows when I'm feeling a little anxious or insecure about something that I'm doing, and he's always trying to be that voice that's louder than the voice that's in my head that I've grown up with.

00:11:55.440 --> 00:12:04.159
Um, so he's he's his voice is speaking a lot louder these days than that inside voice, thankfully, which is why I am where I am right now in in coaching.

00:12:04.240 --> 00:12:05.279
So yeah.

00:12:06.080 --> 00:12:10.000
Yeah, that's it's funny how little things happen in life.

00:12:10.080 --> 00:12:12.000
It sets you down this path.

00:12:13.120 --> 00:12:13.600
Charlie.

00:12:14.720 --> 00:12:15.919
You get the answer now, Charlie.

00:12:16.159 --> 00:12:17.519
So the question was when was the first time?

00:12:17.919 --> 00:12:20.639
When was the first time you felt remember thinking I don't belong here?

00:12:20.960 --> 00:12:22.639
That's a tough question.

00:12:22.879 --> 00:12:24.159
It is, it's very tough.

00:12:24.480 --> 00:12:27.759
Because I don't know that I could pinpoint the first time I felt that.

00:12:27.919 --> 00:12:30.639
Um I felt it in a lot of situations.

00:12:30.799 --> 00:12:31.600
I still do.

00:12:31.919 --> 00:12:35.919
For me, my background a bit, I we moved around a lot growing up.

00:12:36.000 --> 00:12:38.240
Um, construction, not military.

00:12:38.960 --> 00:12:44.960
Um I went to, I can't tell you how many elementary schools, just one middle school and four different high schools.

00:12:45.279 --> 00:12:47.440
Well, now, Charlie, that says a lot.

00:12:48.960 --> 00:12:50.399
That says a lot, right there.

00:12:50.720 --> 00:12:51.120
Yeah.

00:12:51.440 --> 00:12:58.080
So I think I just always felt that way because I don't think I really ever had a place that I did feel like I did belong.

00:12:58.399 --> 00:13:08.480
I never had like a home base or you know, what was the longest uh what was the longest place you stayed in in your formative education, like two years, two years?

00:13:08.960 --> 00:13:10.799
Um it was about three years, and that was Oregon.

00:13:10.879 --> 00:13:11.919
And then that's where I ended up.

00:13:12.240 --> 00:13:14.000
And how I'm sorry, how old, Brie?

00:13:14.320 --> 00:13:15.679
Uh fifth through eighth grade.

00:13:15.919 --> 00:13:16.480
Fifth grade.

00:13:16.639 --> 00:13:16.799
Yeah.

00:13:16.879 --> 00:13:17.759
Oh pretty much.

00:13:17.840 --> 00:13:18.799
And then you're off again.

00:13:20.159 --> 00:13:23.200
So you're about age 14 at eighth grade.

00:13:23.279 --> 00:13:25.440
That's tough, tough 12 to 14 tough age.

00:13:25.600 --> 00:13:27.600
We talk about that on this podcast all the time.

00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:28.320
Yeah.

00:13:28.480 --> 00:13:31.840
So then back to the road, a lot of moving.

00:13:32.159 --> 00:13:38.080
Um, so just though those years, it was just never really like I belong here.

00:13:38.240 --> 00:13:41.679
Um, it was never part of like any sports teams or anything like that.

00:13:41.759 --> 00:13:45.039
I did a little bit of like band and choir in middle school.

00:13:45.200 --> 00:13:48.480
Um, so maybe then, I guess.

00:13:48.720 --> 00:13:50.399
But I think I don't know.

00:13:50.559 --> 00:13:57.759
I can't pinpoint a time or a specific one instance where I felt I didn't belong.

00:13:58.480 --> 00:14:02.879
I can think of a few like examples that stand out to me, if that makes sense.

00:14:03.039 --> 00:14:03.200
Yeah.

00:14:03.360 --> 00:14:03.840
But not the first.

00:14:04.080 --> 00:14:06.480
Well, what about the first day of school every time you went to the new school?

00:14:06.720 --> 00:14:07.679
Yeah, yeah, probably.

00:14:07.840 --> 00:14:08.480
Every single time.

00:14:08.879 --> 00:14:09.039
Tough.

00:14:09.279 --> 00:14:09.600
Yeah.

00:14:10.240 --> 00:14:13.360
Did you did you have a hard time making friends at school?

00:14:13.759 --> 00:14:14.720
No, I didn't.

00:14:15.360 --> 00:14:18.799
I didn't have a so you you were able to quickly make friends.

00:14:18.960 --> 00:14:20.720
I mean, you're pretty good at it, you became a veteran at it.

00:14:21.039 --> 00:14:22.000
Yeah, I guess so.

00:14:22.159 --> 00:14:23.759
I mean, because you just get used to it.

00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:26.000
And also you don't get too attached.

00:14:27.039 --> 00:14:27.519
True.

00:14:27.840 --> 00:14:28.720
So yeah.

00:14:29.679 --> 00:14:32.000
Wow, you guys have got really good reasons.

00:14:32.639 --> 00:14:33.200
I don't.

00:14:33.440 --> 00:14:40.320
I really don't have a re I mean, I really don't have any, I mean, I I I had a stable, very stable childhood.

00:14:40.480 --> 00:14:45.279
I couldn't, you couldn't ask for a more stable upraising than I had.

00:14:45.600 --> 00:14:49.360
Um, I just always wondered.

00:14:49.440 --> 00:14:54.080
I, you know, I wasn't big enough, I wasn't fast enough, I was insecure about whatever.

00:14:54.320 --> 00:15:03.039
And those little things add up, and then and then you you get to a position and you're like, well, you don't belong here, you're an imposter, you're not good enough.

00:15:03.600 --> 00:15:10.320
It's you know, it's it's it's it's curious, it's a mystery.

00:15:11.279 --> 00:15:20.320
Um have you guys ever been promoted praise or put in a leadership role and secretly thought if they really knew me, they wouldn't have picked me.

00:15:22.960 --> 00:15:24.000
Go ahead, coach.

00:15:26.080 --> 00:15:26.480
Same order.

00:15:26.720 --> 00:15:27.279
Yeah, same order.

00:15:27.519 --> 00:15:27.840
Same order.

00:15:28.240 --> 00:15:29.600
Well, I'm supposed to go first, aren't I?

00:15:29.759 --> 00:15:31.200
Oh yes, technically, Sam is.

00:15:31.360 --> 00:15:31.840
I don't know.

00:15:32.000 --> 00:15:32.879
I I I don't know.

00:15:32.960 --> 00:15:38.480
If if I ever been promoted praise or put in a leadership, I seriously thought if they they wouldn't have picked me.

00:15:39.120 --> 00:15:49.840
I don't actually in my career I don't know that I was that insecure about it.

00:15:50.000 --> 00:16:01.600
I mean I figured that I had if I had a reputation, if I had a national reputation, I got hired this job, then um I must have done something right to get myself there.

00:16:01.919 --> 00:16:08.720
But it doesn't mean that yeah, I I I I I don't I don't so I don't think I have been, Liz.

00:16:09.200 --> 00:16:10.480
Talk about your experience.

00:16:11.759 --> 00:16:26.159
Uh any anytime I've been promoted or put into a leadership role, yeah, it's that voice, unfortunately that voice mine, my own.

00:16:26.399 --> 00:16:26.720
Your own.

00:16:26.879 --> 00:16:40.240
Um I hear my stepmom still, but mostly it's I have I started to kind of believe what she was saying when I was little because I, you know, she was supposed to be a mother figure and she was in my life a lot.

00:16:40.480 --> 00:16:46.960
Um unfortunately, I only got to see my mom every other weekend, so that was the way the custody was established.

00:16:47.039 --> 00:16:49.360
So I didn't get to see my mom very much growing up.

00:16:49.600 --> 00:16:56.159
I did end up moving in with her when I was 13 because I realized that that's not what your child's hood's supposed to look like.

00:16:56.399 --> 00:16:59.279
Um and that could be a whole other podcast.

00:16:59.600 --> 00:17:03.279
But um that voice stuck with me.

00:17:03.360 --> 00:17:17.759
And so anytime I do anything, whether it's um, you know, coaching or, you know, uh anything in CrossFit even or a promotion at work, um, I was promoted at my last job.

00:17:17.839 --> 00:17:22.480
I was moved into an account director position where I actually led our account team.

00:17:22.640 --> 00:17:25.359
Um and when I got back up, what's that mean?

00:17:25.599 --> 00:17:26.640
Don't just dust that off.

00:17:26.720 --> 00:17:27.279
What does that mean?

00:17:27.440 --> 00:17:28.000
Account team.

00:17:28.079 --> 00:17:29.759
It sounds like there's more than one person on the team.

00:17:29.839 --> 00:17:30.799
How many people are on the team?

00:17:31.039 --> 00:17:33.680
I had three direct reports.

00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:47.119
And it was an ad agency, so I mean that's not going to be anything large, but I had three direct reports, and then they asked me to go speak in Germany on social media, in market social media and food ingredient marketing, and give that crazy.

00:17:47.519 --> 00:17:48.799
That's a pretty big deal.

00:17:49.119 --> 00:17:51.440
And I was nervous the entire time.

00:17:51.599 --> 00:17:59.759
And thankfully at that time, I um was with my husband, my now husband, and he was able to talk me up the entire time getting there.

00:17:59.839 --> 00:18:03.039
And I will tell you, sweaty palms, shaking papers.

00:18:03.200 --> 00:18:07.039
Thank goodness there was a podium that I could actually hide behind.

00:18:07.200 --> 00:18:08.720
Yeah, hold me up.

00:18:08.960 --> 00:18:11.839
Um the voices were really loud that day.

00:18:12.079 --> 00:18:36.400
Um, but I had him in the crowd, and um funny, if you ever, if anybody ever sees Chris and I in a room together, if I'm ever doing anything that's going to put me in any sort of light or put me in a position to where others are watching or things like that, we always make eye contact because I need that's the moment I need his voice.

00:18:36.559 --> 00:18:42.000
And we don't say anything, but it's just that eye contact that kind of talks that imposter down a little bit.

00:18:42.480 --> 00:18:45.839
And so it's almost like I need somebody to quiet that voice.

00:18:45.920 --> 00:18:46.960
The voice is getting loud.

00:18:47.119 --> 00:18:49.039
And so I use him to do that.

00:18:49.200 --> 00:18:56.880
Now, there's a lot of situations where he's not able to be there, so I have to do that myself, but it happens all the time.

00:18:57.200 --> 00:18:59.920
It doesn't even have to be a promotion, a leadership, or anything.

00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:01.119
It it happens all the time.

00:19:01.200 --> 00:19:06.799
I can be in the presence of fellow coaches at the gym and standing amongst those coaches, I feel it.

00:19:07.200 --> 00:19:14.880
And so I almost have to either talk myself down or I just quietly leave the situation because I don't feel like I shouldn't be there.

00:19:16.160 --> 00:19:16.880
Gracious.

00:19:17.599 --> 00:19:18.880
Um, Charlie?

00:19:19.839 --> 00:19:20.319
Yeah.

00:19:20.559 --> 00:19:36.000
Um so probably most distinct to me, any leadership role, um, probably for me was the first time I was asked to be a Bible study leader um and then to join a women's ministry team and leave all of the women.

00:19:36.079 --> 00:19:43.920
Like that was probably and I I said no to it initially because I thought, no way, no way am I qualified for that.

00:19:44.319 --> 00:19:53.279
Um do you do you guys think that in both your instances, maybe this applies, maybe it doesn't.

00:19:53.440 --> 00:19:56.079
I know I think in my instance it applies.

00:19:56.559 --> 00:20:11.359
You are do you have a hard time um I'm I'm I'm sort of a it's hard to my two CrossFit coaches will never believe I'm saying this, but um I'm kind of a perfectionist.

00:20:11.519 --> 00:20:22.160
And it and I'm a guy that if I don't think that it's done 100% done exactly right, then I'm not entitled to even say anything about it.

00:20:22.400 --> 00:20:23.119
You know what I mean?

00:20:23.359 --> 00:20:33.119
So do you think being driven so in your case of the Bible study or your case in your career promotions, do you think that maybe that plays a role in it?

00:20:33.279 --> 00:20:40.480
The the fact that you're that the that you you don't really settle, that you're driven, that you think that it's gotta be perfect.

00:20:40.720 --> 00:20:42.880
Does that do you think that might be play a role?

00:20:43.119 --> 00:20:43.440
For sure.

00:20:43.680 --> 00:20:44.880
Yeah, yeah.

00:20:45.119 --> 00:20:51.599
Um yeah, probably um I'm not I don't want to speak for you, but I set a very high expectation for myself.

00:20:51.839 --> 00:20:52.319
Yes.

00:20:52.559 --> 00:20:57.599
Um and if I don't meet that expectation, that's my expectation.

00:20:57.759 --> 00:21:01.119
You know, others will have another a different expectation, but I set that pretty high.

00:21:01.200 --> 00:21:04.400
And if I don't meet that, then I don't I feel like I failed.

00:21:04.640 --> 00:21:05.279
Yeah.

00:21:05.599 --> 00:21:06.960
Yeah, I'm the same way.

00:21:07.200 --> 00:21:15.680
Um I um uh and I I think that's part of growth is to let that go a little bit.

00:21:15.839 --> 00:21:17.599
Have you ever been able to let that go?

00:21:17.759 --> 00:21:19.039
I'm working on it.

00:21:19.359 --> 00:21:20.000
I know.

00:21:20.799 --> 00:21:25.599
I'm really, really working on it last six or eight months.

00:21:26.319 --> 00:21:31.359
Um have you are have you been able to let some of that go?

00:21:31.440 --> 00:21:32.640
Are you still that way?

00:21:32.880 --> 00:21:35.039
And do you think it's healthy to let it go?

00:21:36.079 --> 00:21:37.680
Because only big guy is perfect, right?

00:21:37.759 --> 00:21:41.359
So I haven't I can't no, I don't let it go.

00:21:41.519 --> 00:21:45.279
I still definitely set that high expectation for myself in all things.

00:21:45.440 --> 00:21:47.119
I definitely pursue that.

00:21:47.359 --> 00:21:51.920
Um I don't let that go, but I also don't let it stop me from doing things.

00:21:52.720 --> 00:21:54.799
So I mean, that's how we are.

00:21:54.960 --> 00:21:55.839
We can't help it.

00:21:56.079 --> 00:21:59.759
And speaking of CrossFit, I think anybody who is committed to CrossFit.

00:22:00.240 --> 00:22:08.799
For any period of time has some level of that going on, wanting to be better, wanting to try to pursue something.

00:22:08.960 --> 00:22:10.480
Everybody's trying to pursue something.

00:22:10.720 --> 00:22:21.359
Either it's a misgip, maybe it's a perceived uh failure in their past athletic life, which is a lot, probably 90% of mine.

00:22:23.680 --> 00:22:30.640
Or it's maybe they were the star athlete, and now there's nothing there, and they they need to fill that gap.

00:22:34.240 --> 00:22:35.920
Or it's just wanting to be better.

00:22:36.559 --> 00:22:37.680
Or just want to want to be better.

00:22:38.559 --> 00:22:39.519
You're just a German person.

00:22:40.799 --> 00:22:47.839
And CrossFit is full of metrics, and we're all gonna, you know, the just just we're doing the CrossFit open.

00:22:47.920 --> 00:22:51.519
And I'm trying to get away from CrossFit on this podcast, but it's part of my life.

00:22:51.599 --> 00:22:52.480
It is what it is.

00:22:52.720 --> 00:22:54.400
Um you enjoyed it.

00:22:54.720 --> 00:22:57.519
It just doesn't look like from CrossFit.

00:22:57.839 --> 00:22:58.960
I know, I know.

00:22:59.200 --> 00:23:06.799
Um, but that it's it is a very good mirror of what what it's a really good measurement of where you're truly at.

00:23:07.440 --> 00:23:08.960
Um, where you're truly at.

00:23:09.119 --> 00:23:15.599
And and this last workout we just did is, you know, I I hear where Sam truly at?

00:23:15.920 --> 00:23:21.200
Sam has truly got very serious mobility problems.

00:23:21.440 --> 00:23:29.839
And Sam has got um it needs vast improvement on skill problems.

00:23:30.319 --> 00:23:34.960
Um and um I I think you guys probably hit a wall too.

00:23:35.039 --> 00:23:41.519
Well, I saw you do yours, so you hit a wall, I know, but I my sense is that that's not because of a skill problem, that's maybe because of another issue.

00:23:41.680 --> 00:23:46.720
But um uh yeah.

00:23:47.039 --> 00:23:48.400
And we just want to drive through that.

00:23:48.480 --> 00:23:49.279
We won't be perfect.

00:23:49.359 --> 00:23:52.000
We wanted to perfectly complete that workout under the time cap.

00:23:52.319 --> 00:23:54.720
And um but even if we had, we would have to do that.

00:23:54.880 --> 00:23:55.920
Then the time wouldn't have been faster.

00:23:56.000 --> 00:23:57.119
Yeah, we would have done it faster.

00:23:57.279 --> 00:23:57.440
Yeah.

00:23:58.079 --> 00:24:04.319
So I don't know if that's uh I'm getting away from my topic of the day here, but I don't know if that's good or if it's bad.

00:24:04.400 --> 00:24:06.319
I I I think I think pursuit is good.

00:24:06.480 --> 00:24:07.599
I think pursuit is good.

00:24:08.559 --> 00:24:16.960
But I uh my my dad, and I've I'll say this again, but I I've said it before, but this is podcasts are like radio shows.

00:24:17.039 --> 00:24:18.240
People tune in and they tune out.

00:24:18.480 --> 00:24:24.559
But um my dad once said, and I never understood what he said, but he said, Too much of any one damn thing will kill you.

00:24:25.519 --> 00:24:28.720
And I didn't know what he meant by it, but now I do.

00:24:28.960 --> 00:24:29.599
Yeah.

00:24:31.519 --> 00:24:32.000
Mm-hmm.

00:24:33.039 --> 00:24:33.519
Mm-hmm.

00:24:34.160 --> 00:24:34.480
Okay.

00:24:36.640 --> 00:24:40.160
As a coach, do you ever feel the pressure to have all the answers?

00:24:43.839 --> 00:24:46.079
I don't feel the pressure to have all the answers.

00:24:46.240 --> 00:24:47.519
I feel the desire to.

00:24:47.920 --> 00:24:50.000
I want to be able to help people.

00:24:50.160 --> 00:24:56.640
I want to have the answers to why they don't have their double unders or why where the lift is falling apart.

00:24:56.799 --> 00:25:00.799
Um, but I I don't feel pressure to have all the answers.

00:25:01.200 --> 00:25:02.240
And I'm okay to say that.

00:25:02.480 --> 00:25:04.799
What happens to you internally if you don't if you don't know?

00:25:04.960 --> 00:25:09.519
What happens to you internally if you if you say that you don't know, don't have the answer?

00:25:09.920 --> 00:25:12.799
Um I don't think anything happens to me internally.

00:25:12.880 --> 00:25:14.720
I'm okay with that, genuinely.

00:25:14.880 --> 00:25:17.200
Um, but I also am gonna pursue it.

00:25:17.440 --> 00:25:23.920
I know a lot of other great coaches and people that I can um get my own coaching and advice from to help people.

00:25:24.079 --> 00:25:24.319
Yeah.

00:25:24.559 --> 00:25:27.519
So I um I don't I don't stop there again.

00:25:27.680 --> 00:25:29.680
I don't have the answer, but that's not the end of it.

00:25:29.920 --> 00:25:30.160
Yeah.

00:25:30.319 --> 00:25:30.559
Right?

00:25:30.640 --> 00:25:32.000
That's now we're gonna figure it out.

00:25:32.240 --> 00:25:33.599
Right, right, right.

00:25:34.160 --> 00:25:36.880
Liz, do you feel like uh pressure to have some answers?

00:25:37.279 --> 00:25:39.119
Yeah, all the answers, not some.

00:25:39.279 --> 00:25:40.480
All I agree with you.

00:25:40.559 --> 00:25:42.480
Pressure's probably not the right word.

00:25:42.799 --> 00:25:48.079
Um, I think I feel like there's a perception that I should have answers.

00:25:48.240 --> 00:25:52.640
Um, and I'm totally comfortable saying, I don't know, but let me find out.

00:25:52.799 --> 00:25:53.680
Let me find out for you.

00:25:53.759 --> 00:25:54.559
Because I'm the same way.

00:25:54.720 --> 00:25:57.200
If I don't know the answer, I'm gonna go find it.

00:25:57.279 --> 00:25:59.519
Um, I'm not somebody that's just gonna stop there.

00:25:59.839 --> 00:26:02.480
Um, I'm in this role because I want to help people.

00:26:02.720 --> 00:26:06.880
I want to make an impact on their lives so that they can go make an impact on others' lives.

00:26:06.960 --> 00:26:09.279
Like I just that domino effect, right?

00:26:09.519 --> 00:26:12.079
So I'll I'll fight tooth and nail.

00:26:12.160 --> 00:26:13.440
I'll go find some resources.

00:26:13.599 --> 00:26:19.200
We have great coaches at the gym that I can refer to, or even I have some friends that are outside that I can talk to.

00:26:19.440 --> 00:26:21.440
So um, yeah, I'm the same way.

00:26:21.519 --> 00:26:22.400
I would pursue it.

00:26:22.559 --> 00:26:29.599
I don't feel that pressure, but there might be a perception because we're standing up in front of that class that we should have the answer.

00:26:30.079 --> 00:26:39.039
How do you handle not having all the answers without uh without losing credibility?

00:26:42.240 --> 00:26:45.200
I don't think I don't feel like I lose credibility.

00:26:45.839 --> 00:26:49.200
Um, that's never a concern.

00:26:50.400 --> 00:27:00.480
Um I think we get I think the athlete respects us more because we are honest with them and we tell them we don't know, but we'll find out for them.

00:27:00.880 --> 00:27:01.519
Right.

00:27:02.160 --> 00:27:02.400
Right.

00:27:02.720 --> 00:27:10.559
And then that builds that trust, which at the end of the day, that's what we're doing as coaches, is we're trying to gain their trust because it's it's gained and earned.

00:27:10.720 --> 00:27:19.119
Um so we have to work to get that, and that's and to keep it, and that's the best way to do that is to be completely transparent with them.

00:27:19.519 --> 00:27:20.000
Straightforward.

00:27:20.160 --> 00:27:20.319
Yep.

00:27:20.480 --> 00:27:21.599
I'm all about it.

00:27:22.240 --> 00:27:26.799
What's the difference between humility and the imposter syndrome?

00:27:27.279 --> 00:27:28.640
I'm gonna answer this.

00:27:28.880 --> 00:27:32.400
Um I don't know.

00:27:33.759 --> 00:27:34.960
I don't know.

00:27:35.519 --> 00:27:41.680
Um I I don't know if people view me as a humble person or not.

00:27:43.039 --> 00:27:46.400
Um Sam's Sam's psychology.

00:27:46.480 --> 00:27:47.119
Here we go.

00:27:47.440 --> 00:27:52.240
Um But I I think that I am a humble person.

00:27:52.400 --> 00:27:57.599
And I think, you know, just not not by wanting to be in the middle of that room makes me a humble person.

00:27:57.839 --> 00:27:59.519
Like I don't I don't want the spotlight.

00:27:59.680 --> 00:28:02.480
So to me, that's that's a little humility, humility.

00:28:02.720 --> 00:28:08.480
But not to have that spotlight also means maybe I'm in I I I think I'm the imposter.

00:28:08.720 --> 00:28:10.079
So I don't know.

00:28:11.519 --> 00:28:14.160
I wonder if a guy fixed his humility.

00:28:14.559 --> 00:28:15.920
Well, humility's a good thing.

00:28:16.079 --> 00:28:21.119
I'm not I'm not uh I'm not apologizing for being humble.

00:28:22.000 --> 00:28:31.200
But uh humility is is okay to an extent because if it may if if if it makes you cross into that imposter syndrome, then maybe we have a problem there.

00:28:31.920 --> 00:28:35.440
So I I can I don't know that I can tell the difference between the two.

00:28:35.599 --> 00:28:36.319
Can you guys?

00:28:37.119 --> 00:28:41.279
No, I think that line's pretty blurred in between the two.

00:28:41.519 --> 00:28:41.920
Yeah.

00:28:42.640 --> 00:28:45.920
There is a quote that is credited to C.S.

00:28:46.079 --> 00:28:46.559
Lewis.

00:28:46.880 --> 00:28:47.279
Love C.

00:28:47.440 --> 00:28:47.519
S.

00:28:47.599 --> 00:28:47.839
Lewis.

00:28:48.160 --> 00:28:56.079
Um, I'm not sure the quote was his or more the idea, but it is that um humility is not thinking less of yourself, but is thinking of yourself less.

00:28:57.519 --> 00:29:03.359
So it's not diminishing your value, it's just diminishing the time and space you spend thinking of me.

00:29:03.680 --> 00:29:12.960
So with that thought, and I love that quote, I feel like that puts um impostor syndrome as the opposite of humility, right?

00:29:13.119 --> 00:29:17.119
Because imposter syndrome says it's you're thinking less of yourself.

00:29:17.279 --> 00:29:20.799
I don't deserve this, I haven't earned this, I can't do this, whatever it is.

00:29:20.880 --> 00:29:27.039
So you're thinking less of yourself, whereas humility just thinks of yourself less.

00:29:27.519 --> 00:29:28.160
Wow.

00:29:29.759 --> 00:29:30.400
Wow.

00:29:31.920 --> 00:29:35.440
I I I'm not gonna ask you to repeat all that, but I'm gonna replay that one.

00:29:35.519 --> 00:29:37.119
We're gonna chop that one up into a video.

00:29:37.440 --> 00:29:38.559
I can repeat it if you want.

00:29:38.799 --> 00:29:40.640
Please do, because it's it's very profound.

00:29:40.799 --> 00:29:41.440
What did he say?

00:29:41.759 --> 00:29:47.200
So he said humility is not thinking less of yourself, but it is thinking of yourself less.

00:29:47.519 --> 00:29:47.839
Yeah.

00:29:48.000 --> 00:29:48.319
Okay.

00:29:48.799 --> 00:29:52.880
So um imposter syndrome is thinking less of yourself.

00:29:53.119 --> 00:29:53.279
Yes.

00:29:53.920 --> 00:29:58.480
Questioning your credibility, it's questioning um whether you should be there.

00:29:58.720 --> 00:30:03.440
Whereas humility is just thinking of yourself less, but thinking of others more.

00:30:03.839 --> 00:30:04.400
Wow.

00:30:04.720 --> 00:30:05.759
You're you got it, man.

00:30:05.920 --> 00:30:06.720
I think that's the answer.

00:30:07.759 --> 00:30:08.400
That's the answer.

00:30:08.799 --> 00:30:09.759
I don't know if it's the answer.

00:30:10.240 --> 00:30:10.960
I do, Charlie.

00:30:11.119 --> 00:30:12.480
Don't be humble about that.

00:30:12.799 --> 00:30:21.440
My favorite guitar player, uh, I was watching some video about uh he's he's hilarious, he's very dry, his toast, but he said he doesn't, and he is, he's very humble.

00:30:21.519 --> 00:30:30.079
He doesn't I've talked to him about I happen to know like he's my rock guitar hero, and I actually am on a I have a personal relationship with the guy who just blows my mind.

00:30:30.160 --> 00:30:31.359
But anyway, I've talked to him.

00:30:31.759 --> 00:30:41.519
Like he he is he's very uncomfortable when you start talking about ranking, because you can legitimately rank this guy in the top 50 guitar rock guitar players that ever lived, ever walked face to the earth.

00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:46.240
And I think right now I'm the most probably top 10 active guitar players in the world.

00:30:46.400 --> 00:30:48.400
And he does, he doesn't he does not go there.

00:30:48.480 --> 00:30:50.960
He'll just he just he doesn't he doesn't want to talk about it.

00:30:51.119 --> 00:30:55.599
He doesn't, you know, I'm like, you know, I'm like someone says uh said this about you, and he doesn't he doesn't want to talk about it.

00:30:55.680 --> 00:30:57.279
He just he doesn't want to talk about it.

00:30:57.440 --> 00:30:58.640
And so he's really funny.

00:30:58.720 --> 00:31:05.359
But he uh in one of the video I saw recently of him being here, he goes, he goes, he goes, I am they said, you know, you're extremely humble.

00:31:05.519 --> 00:31:08.319
He goes, Well, I am extremely, extremely humble.

00:31:09.599 --> 00:31:11.839
I'm just not humble about my humility.

00:31:12.000 --> 00:31:13.680
And I just thought it was the funniest thing ever.

00:31:13.920 --> 00:31:17.039
Anyway, I posted, I think, that that two couple days ago.

00:31:19.920 --> 00:31:20.960
Oh man.

00:31:21.359 --> 00:31:33.440
Um have you ever almost held yourself back from an opportunity because you didn't feel ready yet?

00:31:37.279 --> 00:31:39.279
I'm trying to think if I have.

00:31:41.759 --> 00:31:44.559
CrossFit, just starting CrossFit for sure.

00:31:44.799 --> 00:31:45.119
Yeah.

00:31:46.400 --> 00:31:50.799
I I just I saw it, I'm like, there's no way, there's no way I can do that.

00:31:50.960 --> 00:31:51.359
No way.

00:31:51.519 --> 00:31:53.519
I went through this for like four or five years.

00:31:53.759 --> 00:31:55.119
I can't do that.

00:31:55.359 --> 00:31:58.720
Um and of course I kicked myself now.

00:31:58.960 --> 00:32:04.160
I wish I would have started it four years prior to when I did well, five, you know, four or five years.

00:32:05.200 --> 00:32:07.599
But every I think everything works out for a reason, also.

00:32:07.759 --> 00:32:08.559
So I don't know.

00:32:08.640 --> 00:32:11.200
I think it whatever's happens, happens.

00:32:11.440 --> 00:32:12.880
There's a reason for it.

00:32:13.359 --> 00:32:24.240
Um But I that that that definitely I was an imposter syndrome walking in the gym, and I still I I even I think I had this conversation with you, Charlie, like a week or two ago.

00:32:24.480 --> 00:32:31.359
Oh, I did a competition, and I and I said, I feel like an imposter here, but that's absolutely ridiculous.

00:32:31.519 --> 00:32:34.160
I've been doing this for 10 flipping years.

00:32:34.400 --> 00:32:35.599
I'm not an imposter.

00:32:36.480 --> 00:32:38.559
Um that's uh perfectionism again.

00:32:39.200 --> 00:32:43.519
It's not about being a profo uh imposter, excuse me, it's about being imperfect.

00:32:43.759 --> 00:32:44.000
Yes.

00:32:44.319 --> 00:32:45.440
I'm not the best.

00:32:46.000 --> 00:32:46.559
Not even close.

00:32:47.119 --> 00:32:51.440
I don't deserve to be here, but even the best started out not the best.

00:32:51.759 --> 00:32:52.319
Right.

00:32:53.200 --> 00:32:53.839
True.

00:32:54.880 --> 00:33:01.680
So did you guys uh is there a time that you can think of where you held back from an opportunity because you just didn't think you were ready?

00:33:06.160 --> 00:33:09.599
See, these are driven people probably not.

00:33:10.240 --> 00:33:16.880
You know, I will say, even though I deal with that feeling unprepared, feeling unready, feeling unqualified.

00:33:17.039 --> 00:33:19.920
Um, again, I said it earlier, but I don't let it stop me.

00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:21.119
I do it anyway.

00:33:21.279 --> 00:33:24.240
Um, and I've found that sometimes that's the best.

00:33:24.319 --> 00:33:27.279
Like the first weightlifting meet I did, I had no idea what I was doing.

00:33:27.519 --> 00:33:32.400
I was actually, I was in the hospital with my son, who had recently received a medical diagnosis.

00:33:32.480 --> 00:33:36.799
We were in the hospital for a few weeks, and my friend had just come back from Barcelona.

00:33:36.880 --> 00:33:38.799
She had done Master's World Championship.

00:33:38.960 --> 00:33:40.720
She's like, You should try a weightlifting meat.

00:33:40.799 --> 00:33:44.640
And I was only two years into CrossFit, and I'm like, I don't know what that means.

00:33:44.960 --> 00:33:47.039
She's like, we lived in Portland at the time.

00:33:47.119 --> 00:33:50.240
Um she's like, come try this meat in uh Salt Lake City.

00:33:50.319 --> 00:33:51.200
This was August.

00:33:51.279 --> 00:33:52.319
She said it's in November.

00:33:52.400 --> 00:33:53.200
Just try it and see.

00:33:53.359 --> 00:33:54.240
So I'm like, okay.

00:33:54.319 --> 00:33:57.279
So I ordered a like gymnastic singlet off of Etsy.

00:33:57.519 --> 00:34:01.279
Um and I just showed up and I had no idea what I was doing.

00:34:01.359 --> 00:34:03.119
I still don't feel like I do.

00:34:03.440 --> 00:34:07.839
But I just went because it's I think it's better just to go.

00:34:08.000 --> 00:34:08.880
I don't know what I'm doing.

00:34:08.960 --> 00:34:09.920
Did I deserve to be there?

00:34:10.079 --> 00:34:10.239
No.

00:34:10.400 --> 00:34:12.000
Did anybody deserve to be there?

00:34:12.239 --> 00:34:12.800
I don't know.

00:34:12.960 --> 00:34:16.639
Some of them did, but I call that ready fire aim.

00:34:16.800 --> 00:34:17.039
Yeah.

00:34:17.360 --> 00:34:18.559
Ready, fire aim, right?

00:34:18.800 --> 00:34:19.440
Or ready, yeah.

00:34:19.599 --> 00:34:20.400
I like fire aim.

00:34:20.480 --> 00:34:20.559
Yeah.

00:34:20.719 --> 00:34:21.440
Ready fire aim.

00:34:21.599 --> 00:34:22.159
Yep.

00:34:22.559 --> 00:34:26.400
What I love out of all that is you just said, I don't think I still know what I'm doing.

00:34:26.480 --> 00:34:30.320
But she like coaches people to do this.

00:34:30.559 --> 00:34:32.239
She literally coaches people to compete this.

00:34:32.320 --> 00:34:41.840
And she coached me for a while, and I'm sitting here thinking to myself, oh my gosh, Charlie, if only you knew like how much I think of you when it comes to weightlifting.

00:34:41.920 --> 00:34:49.280
Like it's that when you saying that statement, I'm like, oh girl, you are like hashtag goals when it comes to weightlifting.

00:34:49.360 --> 00:34:50.159
I thank you.

00:34:50.239 --> 00:34:50.719
I don't see that.

00:34:50.960 --> 00:34:52.239
And you don't and all, no.

00:34:52.480 --> 00:34:53.440
And that's crazy.

00:34:53.760 --> 00:34:55.280
My God, Charlie, you're a professional.

00:34:55.599 --> 00:34:56.239
I know.

00:34:56.559 --> 00:34:57.199
I know.

00:34:58.159 --> 00:34:58.559
I know.

00:34:58.639 --> 00:35:03.119
When they told us we were getting a weightlifting coach at Kinesis, I was like, this is gonna be awesome.

00:35:03.519 --> 00:35:04.159
Yeah.

00:35:04.800 --> 00:35:05.920
Yeah, there she is.

00:35:06.159 --> 00:35:07.199
And there she is.

00:35:08.960 --> 00:35:12.639
She's changing, she's changing how people she's changing how people lift.

00:35:12.719 --> 00:35:15.280
And we have people that would never have done a meet.

00:35:15.360 --> 00:35:19.840
And I just heard of three of my friends now going and doing a weightlifting meet because of you.

00:35:20.079 --> 00:35:22.480
So you know what you're doing.

00:35:22.719 --> 00:35:23.360
Absolutely.

00:35:24.320 --> 00:35:25.519
Absolutely.

00:35:26.800 --> 00:35:31.039
So what what has maybe changed your mindset on the imposter syndrome?

00:35:31.199 --> 00:35:33.599
I mean, we're we're obviously still kind of still there.

00:35:33.760 --> 00:35:39.440
Liz has still got the voice, Charlie still questions whether or not she should she should be a weightlifting coach.

00:35:39.519 --> 00:35:43.440
And Sam wonders what in the hell he's doing CrossFit for.

00:35:43.840 --> 00:35:48.079
Um but what's changed for you?

00:35:48.320 --> 00:35:49.360
Was it an experience?

00:35:49.519 --> 00:35:50.480
Was it repetition?

00:35:50.719 --> 00:35:52.480
Was it someone believing in you?

00:35:52.719 --> 00:35:57.599
Liz you mentioned that or did the voice get quieter.

00:35:58.159 --> 00:35:59.760
What has changed along the way?

00:35:59.920 --> 00:36:08.480
Anything I would say meeting my husband, gosh, ten years ago now.

00:36:08.800 --> 00:36:09.840
Ten years ago.

00:36:10.559 --> 00:36:14.159
Um he helped me quiet the voice.

00:36:14.320 --> 00:36:17.920
So the voice is quieter than it's probably ever been in my entire life.

00:36:18.639 --> 00:36:22.079
Um I have Boy, I bet that gives you a little bit of peace.

00:36:22.400 --> 00:36:23.039
It does.

00:36:23.360 --> 00:36:24.079
It does.

00:36:24.320 --> 00:36:37.199
Um You know, also I have my mom and my stepdad who is actually in the process of adopting me right now, so that's even quieting the voice more.

00:36:37.760 --> 00:36:41.199
Um that's not fully public knowledge, but here we go.

00:36:41.920 --> 00:36:42.400
Now it is.

00:36:45.119 --> 00:36:48.719
No, I've started telling uh my friends I was gonna make a huge big announcement.

00:36:49.920 --> 00:36:50.719
Yeah, nope.

00:36:50.960 --> 00:36:51.360
Nope.

00:36:51.840 --> 00:37:07.119
Um, I'm very excited about it, and it's something I was gonna do once we made it official, but um, we are in the process of of making that totally final that he will be my my dad, he is my dad, but um he will legally be my dad, which is fantastic.

00:37:07.360 --> 00:37:16.800
So I would say over probably just in the last year, that voice has gotten a lot quieter than it's really ever been.

00:37:16.960 --> 00:37:20.159
And I think a lot of that has to do with the people I'm surrounding myself with.

00:37:20.320 --> 00:37:23.280
I've learned to set bigger boundaries.

00:37:23.440 --> 00:37:32.800
Um, and the people that are close to me, my friends, my family members, even, those are the people who help quiet that voice a lot more.

00:37:33.039 --> 00:37:39.199
I don't the the toxic people, I have really tried to minimize my time with them.

00:37:39.360 --> 00:37:41.679
So eliminate your time with them.

00:37:41.920 --> 00:37:42.559
Yeah.

00:37:43.440 --> 00:37:44.719
In some situations you can't.

00:37:44.880 --> 00:37:45.039
Yeah.

00:37:45.199 --> 00:37:48.960
It's it's but you limit it and it it helps a lot.

00:37:49.199 --> 00:37:49.519
Yeah.

00:37:49.760 --> 00:37:50.159
Yeah.

00:37:50.320 --> 00:37:50.719
Yep.

00:37:50.880 --> 00:37:51.360
Yep.

00:37:51.679 --> 00:37:53.840
Charlie's anything changed for you along the way?

00:37:54.559 --> 00:37:58.400
I mean, I for you though, you well, I don't know, but you but you've said it, Charlie.

00:37:58.480 --> 00:37:59.920
You said that I'll do it anyway.

00:38:00.320 --> 00:38:00.559
Yeah.

00:38:00.719 --> 00:38:02.320
Yeah, I'll do it anyway.

00:38:02.480 --> 00:38:09.840
Um, I think for me, um I just really love to help people.

00:38:09.920 --> 00:38:10.880
That's why I coach.

00:38:11.039 --> 00:38:11.760
I love that.

00:38:11.920 --> 00:38:14.960
It's it's what I was made for, I believe.

00:38:15.119 --> 00:38:29.760
Um and I think as far as weightlifting goes, like for me, even when I compete, like a big part of my struggle in competition and weightlifting is that imposter syndrome, feeling like I don't belong there, watching the other weightlifters who I think are better than me.

00:38:29.920 --> 00:38:32.239
Um and then feeling like I shouldn't be.

00:38:32.719 --> 00:38:33.519
I'm gonna stop you again.

00:38:33.599 --> 00:38:34.639
I'm sorry to interrupt.

00:38:34.880 --> 00:38:36.320
When do you feel that, Charlie?

00:38:36.400 --> 00:38:38.079
Are you are you thinking that between lists?

00:38:38.159 --> 00:38:45.679
I mean, you're not thinking about like you're you're about to do a freaking heavy clean and jerk, which if anybody's tried that, there's a lot that goes into that.

00:38:45.920 --> 00:38:46.800
Is that impossible?

00:38:46.960 --> 00:38:48.000
You're not thinking about lost.

00:38:48.480 --> 00:38:48.960
Oh, yes, I am.

00:38:49.599 --> 00:38:51.920
At the bar, you're thinking about am I good enough to lift this?

00:38:52.159 --> 00:38:52.480
I really am.

00:38:53.679 --> 00:38:54.480
God, I don't believe you.

00:38:54.800 --> 00:38:57.760
So over the years I've I don't I don't I don't believe you.

00:38:58.079 --> 00:38:59.039
It's true, Sam.

00:38:59.199 --> 00:39:00.480
I promise, it's true.

00:39:00.719 --> 00:39:03.039
Um I've worked on techniques to try to.

00:39:03.199 --> 00:39:06.239
I'm thinking about rack position, and you're thinking about am I good enough?

00:39:06.320 --> 00:39:07.440
I'm you're kidding me?

00:39:07.760 --> 00:39:18.400
I try to just like I don't watch the other weightlifters during my own session or during my own lifting time, not because I don't want to, um, but because it just gets to me mentally.

00:39:18.880 --> 00:39:22.239
Um so I try to tune all that out.

00:39:22.320 --> 00:39:30.159
But where I'm going with that is next weekend, I'm taking a few of the Kinesis lifters down to Kansas City to do a weightlifting meet.

00:39:30.400 --> 00:39:34.000
Um in that meet I'm gonna be lifting as well with them.

00:39:34.159 --> 00:39:41.039
So I will be in a session with a couple other ladies that I'll be coaching, but I'll also be coaching for coaching myself and lifting.

00:39:41.199 --> 00:39:44.960
And I'm gonna just kind of be interested to see if that's because you have to watch them.

00:39:45.039 --> 00:39:46.480
Yes, you have to watch your competitors.

00:39:46.880 --> 00:39:49.519
Are you competing against them in the same weight class and all that or all that?

00:39:49.679 --> 00:39:51.280
I don't know y I don't know how it works either.

00:39:51.599 --> 00:39:53.920
Um I might be with one of them, I'm not sure.

00:39:54.159 --> 00:39:54.400
Okay.

00:39:54.480 --> 00:39:56.159
Uh so you have to watch them as a coach now.

00:39:56.400 --> 00:40:07.840
I have but I I'm just curious if my you know putting my attention and my efforts into them and not myself is going to change how I perform and feel on the platform.

00:40:08.159 --> 00:40:08.719
Does that make sense?

00:40:09.039 --> 00:40:10.400
Yes, it does, because you've never done it before.

00:40:10.719 --> 00:40:13.920
I was gonna say, is this the first time that you're actually doing that where you have Yes.

00:40:14.079 --> 00:40:17.920
Usually if I'm coaching, I won't lift because I want to give them everything.

00:40:18.639 --> 00:40:20.960
I I'm gonna explore just a little bit more.

00:40:21.199 --> 00:40:25.440
So so in a weight lifting competition, there are how many I don't know.

00:40:25.519 --> 00:40:26.400
So you're gonna have to tell me.

00:40:26.480 --> 00:40:27.199
So again, the posture.

00:40:27.440 --> 00:40:27.760
I have no idea.

00:40:28.079 --> 00:40:30.000
How many how many lifts do you have to do in a weight lifting?

00:40:30.239 --> 00:40:30.800
Oh, how many lifts?

00:40:31.039 --> 00:40:34.000
You get three attempts at the snatch and then three attempts at the clean a jerk.

00:40:34.159 --> 00:40:34.960
Okay, so on the platform.

00:40:35.280 --> 00:40:39.199
So you could be doing six different a maximum of six lifts in a comp.

00:40:39.599 --> 00:40:39.840
Yes.

00:40:40.159 --> 00:40:41.519
Okay, six, so you're at the barbell.

00:40:41.840 --> 00:40:43.920
On the platform, but you're lifting in the back too.

00:40:44.239 --> 00:40:44.480
Okay.

00:40:44.559 --> 00:40:46.800
Okay, yeah, but I mean on the platform where it counts.

00:40:47.039 --> 00:40:47.360
Correct.

00:40:47.599 --> 00:40:49.519
It's six there's six lifts.

00:40:49.679 --> 00:40:49.920
Yes.

00:40:50.159 --> 00:40:59.599
And so you're telling me when you're on that barbell during all those six lifts, what what is the first thing that goes through your mind?

00:41:00.159 --> 00:41:02.079
Um, so much doubt.

00:41:02.480 --> 00:41:04.159
So much doubt.

00:41:04.400 --> 00:41:04.880
It's hard.

00:41:04.960 --> 00:41:05.199
Yeah.

00:41:05.519 --> 00:41:05.599
Yeah.

00:41:09.440 --> 00:41:10.559
And how beautiful she lifts.

00:41:11.440 --> 00:41:12.719
Yeah, how smooth she is.

00:41:13.039 --> 00:41:13.440
Doubt.

00:41:13.679 --> 00:41:13.840
Yeah.

00:41:13.920 --> 00:41:15.360
It's that's what's your thing.

00:41:15.519 --> 00:41:16.320
Like, I can't do this.

00:41:16.480 --> 00:41:17.840
Is that what you're thinking at the bar?

00:41:18.079 --> 00:41:18.800
Yeah, it's not great.

00:41:18.960 --> 00:41:20.880
I'm glad this, I'm glad this episode is gonna air.

00:41:21.199 --> 00:41:24.000
Can we put like an airpod in here so I can be like, Charlie, you're amazing.

00:41:24.079 --> 00:41:25.760
You can do it against the rules.

00:41:26.159 --> 00:41:30.880
I'm glad this episode is airing after that comp because I wouldn't want your athletes to hear this going into the comp.

00:41:31.679 --> 00:41:38.400
Um you're you're you're seriously thinking I can't do that's that's what's you are you thinking about technique at all?

00:41:38.559 --> 00:41:40.400
Are you thinking about breathing?

00:41:40.559 --> 00:41:42.400
Are you thinking about all those things?

00:41:42.639 --> 00:41:44.159
No, you're like, I can't do this.

00:41:44.320 --> 00:41:44.559
Yeah.

00:41:44.800 --> 00:41:46.880
That's what's that's what you're thinking about on the bar.

00:41:47.119 --> 00:41:53.840
And I try I try as I approach approach it to not even, which is gonna sound strange, but to not really even look at the bar.

00:41:54.000 --> 00:42:02.719
Because if I look at the bar and I see the weight on the bar, especially in competition, it's colored plates, I can't fool myself into thinking it's something that it's not.

00:42:02.960 --> 00:42:11.280
So it's a do you think that you're because you now you obviously there you've hit you've you've made a lot of lifts and you've missed a lot of lifts.

00:42:11.519 --> 00:42:12.079
That's what happens.

00:42:12.239 --> 00:42:12.639
Yep.

00:42:13.039 --> 00:42:22.159
But when you do make a lift, do you think that that is because of spite or defiance?

00:42:22.800 --> 00:42:25.039
Um no, I don't think so.

00:42:25.199 --> 00:42:25.760
What goes on?

00:42:26.079 --> 00:42:26.880
This for me, man.

00:42:26.960 --> 00:42:32.719
I'm gonna I'm gonna believe that if I do something I don't think I can do in CrossFit, it's a hundred percent out of spite.

00:42:32.960 --> 00:42:33.840
No, yeah, I could see that.

00:42:34.239 --> 00:42:34.960
That's very negative.

00:42:35.199 --> 00:42:35.840
Yeah, I could see that.

00:42:36.079 --> 00:42:37.039
I'm working on that, by the way.

00:42:37.199 --> 00:42:38.719
I'm working on that, Coach Charlie.

00:42:39.039 --> 00:42:41.519
Um so you have that feeling when you walk up to the bar.

00:42:41.679 --> 00:42:42.159
Yes.

00:42:42.480 --> 00:42:44.880
What do you say to yourself when you make it?

00:42:45.199 --> 00:42:46.880
Um, it's just relief.

00:42:47.440 --> 00:42:50.559
I don't, I don't probably should celebrate it more.

00:42:50.800 --> 00:42:57.119
I should probably celebrate it more, and I would definitely require that from any of my athletes, but it's more just like relief.

00:42:57.360 --> 00:43:00.079
Okay, now we can just go do the next one.

00:43:01.280 --> 00:43:03.119
Dude, it sounds miserable.

00:43:03.440 --> 00:43:05.519
Are you miserable going to meets?

00:43:05.840 --> 00:43:08.880
No, yes, actually, I am at the beginning of a meet.

00:43:08.960 --> 00:43:11.280
At the end of the meet, it's like just such a relief.

00:43:11.599 --> 00:43:12.320
Why do you go back?

00:43:13.119 --> 00:43:14.719
There's something that keeps you going back.

00:43:15.119 --> 00:43:16.239
Because I want to be better.

00:43:16.400 --> 00:43:17.119
I want to do better.

00:43:17.280 --> 00:43:19.199
I want to be better than I was at the last time.

00:43:19.519 --> 00:43:21.760
Well, Coach Charlie, here's how you can be better today.

00:43:22.000 --> 00:43:22.320
Okay.

00:43:22.719 --> 00:43:24.320
For God's sakes.

00:43:24.960 --> 00:43:27.599
The next time you're at the bar, don't think about doubt.

00:43:27.760 --> 00:43:33.199
Think about that poor, if that poor bastard Sam Fisher can do this without doubt, then I can't.

00:43:33.599 --> 00:43:33.920
Okay.

00:43:34.239 --> 00:43:35.119
I'll try that.

00:43:35.360 --> 00:43:35.679
All right.

00:43:36.000 --> 00:43:37.039
But then she'll start giggling.

00:43:38.800 --> 00:43:39.920
You'll lift tremendously.

00:43:40.159 --> 00:43:40.400
Okay.

00:43:40.559 --> 00:43:41.920
I'm gonna try that next weekend.

00:43:42.239 --> 00:43:42.960
I want you to.

00:43:43.119 --> 00:43:43.440
Okay.

00:43:43.760 --> 00:43:45.920
It'll make you maybe it'll make you chuckle.

00:43:46.079 --> 00:43:46.239
Okay.

00:43:46.559 --> 00:43:48.239
And then maybe you'll just just crush it.

00:43:48.559 --> 00:43:49.039
Do it.

00:43:49.280 --> 00:43:50.400
Or maybe it won't work.

00:43:50.480 --> 00:43:51.199
I don't know.

00:43:54.159 --> 00:43:56.559
Uh so Liz, are you surprised to hear all this?

00:43:56.800 --> 00:43:57.519
Uh yeah.

00:43:57.679 --> 00:43:58.239
Yep.

00:43:58.480 --> 00:43:58.719
Yep.

00:43:59.280 --> 00:43:59.760
What are you kidding?

00:44:00.159 --> 00:44:00.320
Me?

00:44:00.400 --> 00:44:00.639
I know.

00:44:00.800 --> 00:44:04.079
She gets to the barbell, like that's the first thing she thinks is I can't do this.

00:44:04.400 --> 00:44:10.000
Because that's I mean, again, I wish listeners we're gonna we're gonna steal some coverage of her and we're gonna put her on social media.

00:44:10.800 --> 00:44:12.960
Like, here's here's this lady who doesn't think she can do this.

00:44:13.280 --> 00:44:28.800
What's great is and it's not great, but as a coach, I would have I would have never guessed that from her because the way she coaches her athletes is she puts that what's the word I'm looking for?

00:44:28.960 --> 00:44:36.880
She puts the um you're gonna make this lift because of how she coaches you.

00:44:37.199 --> 00:44:49.039
So I remember we did that mock meet, and I was nervous because again, I don't like attention on me, and that's a lot of pressure, and you're in front of all your friends, and you just don't want to miss a lift because it's super embarrassing.

00:44:49.199 --> 00:44:51.440
But the words that you say is you've got this.

00:44:51.519 --> 00:44:52.639
You can pick up, you've got this.

00:44:52.719 --> 00:44:54.719
I've seen you do this lift, and the way she talks to you.

00:44:54.880 --> 00:44:55.679
Charlie Sattler.

00:44:56.079 --> 00:44:56.320
Right.

00:44:56.559 --> 00:44:58.320
Why don't you talk to yourself that way?

00:44:58.639 --> 00:44:59.599
I don't know.

00:44:59.920 --> 00:45:00.400
I don't know.

00:45:01.119 --> 00:45:02.000
Why don't you try that?

00:45:02.159 --> 00:45:03.360
Okay, why don't you try that?

00:45:03.440 --> 00:45:06.320
I got this, and then a little picture of the three words.

00:45:06.480 --> 00:45:08.480
The radio fish will go right through your head.

00:45:08.559 --> 00:45:12.239
And then you're just like, and then as she's lifting, she's smiling.

00:45:12.480 --> 00:45:13.760
She's laughing.

00:45:14.480 --> 00:45:16.719
And then she has relief on her face, like, oh good.

00:45:16.800 --> 00:45:18.400
I was thinking of Sam Fisher.

00:45:18.639 --> 00:45:18.880
Okay.

00:45:19.199 --> 00:45:27.119
I'm reminded, uh, just to it doesn't really fit in here, but I'm reminded of the the the this is a true story, and I don't I'm sure you know this, Charlie.

00:45:27.199 --> 00:45:28.639
Um, well, I mean you were there.

00:45:29.519 --> 00:45:38.239
But uh before Charlie was a coach, you were uh kind of off the side just training weightlifting, and I didn't know who you were, and so I was I I saw you every day.

00:45:38.400 --> 00:45:39.280
You saw me every day.

00:45:39.920 --> 00:45:44.800
Um and uh it was between it was uh I don't remember what we're doing.

00:45:44.960 --> 00:45:49.760
Um it's right, we're going into a tough, tough Metcon or something.

00:45:50.320 --> 00:45:54.239
And again, my my mindset, which I'm trying to prove, coaches.

00:45:54.320 --> 00:45:57.039
I'm I'm I'm really trying to work on my mindset these days.

00:45:57.119 --> 00:46:02.400
But my my mindset was shitty.

00:46:02.639 --> 00:46:10.159
And I I walked past Charlie, I go, I just want you to know that CrossFit is the bleeping, stupidest thing of all time.

00:46:10.719 --> 00:46:12.320
I do remember of course you do.

00:46:12.400 --> 00:46:14.639
It's just it's a heck of a thing to say, isn't it?

00:46:14.880 --> 00:46:16.639
Of course, it's very memorable.

00:46:17.039 --> 00:46:20.239
And then like two weeks later, oh, here's our new coach.

00:46:21.039 --> 00:46:33.280
I oh my God, it reminds me of a time, it reminds me of a time and and and one of my employers, a consultant, quote unquote consultant came in to talk to all the employees to make the organization better, kind of thing.

00:46:33.360 --> 00:46:35.840
So you like you like you spill your guts out.

00:46:36.000 --> 00:46:38.639
And a week later, guess who the new boss is?

00:46:38.880 --> 00:46:39.679
That's how I felt.

00:46:39.760 --> 00:46:45.119
I'm like, I'm like, I am so screwed with this coach right now because she knows I'm just shitty.

00:46:45.360 --> 00:46:46.000
No way.

00:46:46.719 --> 00:46:54.960
So, funny story, speaking of imposter syndrome and my time at Kinesis and my time when I joined Kinesis, so we'll just backtrack.

00:46:55.280 --> 00:46:57.360
Um, I came from another gym that closed.

00:46:57.440 --> 00:47:00.159
Uh, when that gym closed, I decided I'm done coaching.

00:47:00.320 --> 00:47:01.599
It's just I'm just not gonna do it.

00:47:01.679 --> 00:47:03.280
I'm not gonna get involved again.

00:47:03.440 --> 00:47:08.159
Um I was very intimidated by Kinesis because it has a great reputation and for a good reason.

00:47:08.239 --> 00:47:09.519
It's an excellent gym.

00:47:09.760 --> 00:47:13.760
The coaching standard is high, the movement standard by the athletes are high.

00:47:14.159 --> 00:47:18.079
A bunch of alpha uh uh athletes were walking around there, except for then you came into contact with me.

00:47:18.159 --> 00:47:20.320
But no, you you are one of them, Sam.

00:47:20.559 --> 00:47:20.800
No one.

00:47:21.119 --> 00:47:23.920
Um so I was very intimidated to even go there.

00:47:24.159 --> 00:47:29.280
So um a friend of mine who was already there, he was like, just go do open gym.

00:47:29.360 --> 00:47:29.760
So I did.

00:47:29.840 --> 00:47:31.920
I signed up for open gym, I can handle that.

00:47:32.159 --> 00:47:35.519
And so I was off in the back, like Sam said, doing my own thing.

00:47:35.679 --> 00:47:37.920
Um but I I doing your own thing.

00:47:38.000 --> 00:47:41.199
Listeners, she's like hoisting up ridiculous amounts of weight.

00:47:41.440 --> 00:47:43.679
No way, I mean, much more than I can lift.

00:47:43.920 --> 00:47:48.639
Um that time that I spent in the back, like class always looked like so much fun.

00:47:48.719 --> 00:47:50.239
I'm like, they are having fun here.

00:47:50.320 --> 00:47:52.159
Like, not only is it a great gym, but people are having fun.

00:47:52.400 --> 00:47:53.760
Is this the noon class we're talking about?

00:47:53.920 --> 00:47:56.239
It w well, it was all day because you know I'm at the gym all day.

00:47:56.639 --> 00:47:56.800
Okay.

00:47:57.199 --> 00:47:58.079
I didn't know you were all day.

00:47:58.159 --> 00:47:58.239
Okay.

00:47:58.559 --> 00:48:02.559
Well, not all I mean, even that was being most of the day.

00:48:02.800 --> 00:48:03.119
Okay.

00:48:03.840 --> 00:48:06.800
Um, but still, like I was like, ah, I don't want to jump in.

00:48:06.880 --> 00:48:10.719
Like, I didn't feel like I was good enough to be at Kinesis, truly.

00:48:10.880 --> 00:48:21.199
Um, and then the uh the need for a coach came open, and my friend who, Daniel, who brought me to Kinesis, he was like, dude, you should just apply to be a coach.

00:48:21.280 --> 00:48:22.400
I'm like, I'm I'm done coaching.

00:48:22.719 --> 00:48:23.760
Daniel's rapid tiger.

00:48:24.159 --> 00:48:25.440
Um, I'm not gonna do it anymore.

00:48:25.599 --> 00:48:27.519
He's like, Well, they need coaches, just do it.

00:48:27.599 --> 00:48:28.960
So I'm like, okay, fine.

00:48:29.119 --> 00:48:32.320
So then I applied, and anyway, the rest is history.

00:48:32.400 --> 00:48:36.719
But even coming to Kinesis, and that thing was exposed because he given his soul.

00:48:37.280 --> 00:48:40.400
Yeah, tried to scare me away, didn't do it.

00:48:40.639 --> 00:48:43.039
She was like, uh-huh I'm gonna coach.

00:48:44.639 --> 00:48:46.159
Oh, that is so funny.

00:48:47.280 --> 00:48:54.559
Um that was a profound little answer there, Charlie.

00:48:55.760 --> 00:48:58.000
I'm sorry, did we ask you what changed you?

00:48:59.039 --> 00:48:59.760
I believe so.

00:49:00.000 --> 00:49:00.559
We did, okay.

00:49:00.639 --> 00:49:00.800
All right.

00:49:01.039 --> 00:49:01.599
Yeah, Chris.

00:49:01.679 --> 00:49:01.840
Yeah.

00:49:02.239 --> 00:49:02.800
Chris, that's it.

00:49:03.519 --> 00:49:03.840
Sorry, Chris.

00:49:04.079 --> 00:49:05.199
Yeah, he takes all the credit.

00:49:05.440 --> 00:49:06.480
I gotta give him all the credit.

00:49:06.719 --> 00:49:07.840
I forgot that answer, yeah.

00:49:08.159 --> 00:49:10.960
Um really, really interesting stuff.

00:49:11.280 --> 00:49:16.719
Um, do high performers feel imposter syndrome more than the average performers?

00:49:19.360 --> 00:49:20.800
Why or why not?

00:49:21.199 --> 00:49:28.079
I would so here's here's And it doesn't have to be, by the way, it doesn't have to be in CrossFit.

00:49:28.159 --> 00:49:30.880
It's we're talking about career or whatever.

00:49:35.199 --> 00:49:37.360
I would call myself average.

00:49:38.159 --> 00:49:43.039
Um I don't feel I'm not true listeners necessarily a high performer.

00:49:43.119 --> 00:49:47.760
And I kind of that I think of in well, actually in all my life.

00:49:47.840 --> 00:49:56.079
I I've I kind of view I'm just kind of that average Joe that just I myself feel like I give everything I can to everything I do.

00:49:56.480 --> 00:50:00.079
Um, but I wouldn't label myself a high performer necessarily.

00:50:00.239 --> 00:50:06.239
A high performer to me is more visible, like visible, I guess.

00:50:06.480 --> 00:50:07.199
I don't know.

00:50:07.440 --> 00:50:08.159
You can cut all that.

00:50:09.760 --> 00:50:11.119
Yeah, like that at least.

00:50:11.360 --> 00:50:12.159
Yeah, they're okay with it.

00:50:12.320 --> 00:50:13.519
They're comfortable in it.

00:50:14.079 --> 00:50:23.039
Um I don't know, I strive to be a high performer, but I feel I'm more average.

00:50:24.320 --> 00:50:31.119
That's what I'm working towards all the time is I wanna I want to perform the best I possibly can in everything that I do.

00:50:31.599 --> 00:50:33.199
Oh, that makes you a high performer.

00:50:33.599 --> 00:50:33.920
Yeah.

00:50:34.400 --> 00:50:38.559
I don't think the the reason for it um matters as much.

00:50:38.719 --> 00:50:41.199
Like for some people it's because they enjoy the spotlight.

00:50:41.519 --> 00:50:43.440
Um that's not you, that's not me.

00:50:43.599 --> 00:50:47.760
Um, but for some people it's just because they're trying to do it for themselves.

00:50:48.079 --> 00:50:52.159
I would wonder if becoming a mom also kind of acquitted that voice for you.

00:50:52.480 --> 00:50:54.480
And also, you know what I mean.

00:50:54.880 --> 00:50:56.159
You think the heavy metagi?

00:50:56.639 --> 00:50:57.679
Yeah, yes.

00:50:57.840 --> 00:51:00.639
And all that you do to be a good example for her.

00:51:01.440 --> 00:51:02.480
Yeah, yeah.

00:51:02.960 --> 00:51:05.199
Yeah, probably as moms, we yeah.

00:51:06.559 --> 00:51:08.960
We just want to do everything that we can.

00:51:09.119 --> 00:51:09.760
Yeah.

00:51:13.840 --> 00:51:24.719
If someone listening right now feels like they don't belong in their career, their gym, their marriage, their leadership role, et cetera, whatever.

00:51:26.239 --> 00:51:27.440
What would you say to them?

00:51:33.599 --> 00:51:34.639
It's a big question.

00:51:34.960 --> 00:51:35.920
It is a big question.

00:51:36.320 --> 00:51:36.960
It's a big question.

00:51:37.280 --> 00:51:39.440
And I don't think there's any one answer because it's gonna be a different thing.

00:51:39.679 --> 00:51:40.559
Everybody's gonna be different.

00:51:41.119 --> 00:51:44.639
The circumstance, the person, where it is that they feel they don't belong.

00:51:44.880 --> 00:51:47.199
Um, it's all there's gonna be just too many factors.

00:51:47.519 --> 00:51:47.599
Right.

00:51:47.760 --> 00:51:50.880
And the why, why the why is behind it.

00:51:51.840 --> 00:52:01.519
Um, it's gonna be a case where they don't belong in uh a position that they're in, whether that be a relationship or something else.

00:52:02.239 --> 00:52:12.800
Uh uh my answer to that is uh is probably has to do with first of all identity.

00:52:13.599 --> 00:52:16.239
You have to have a very good sense of self.

00:52:16.559 --> 00:52:21.760
And I actually, even though I have imposter syndrome, think I have a good sense of self because I know that I have imposter syndrome.

00:52:21.840 --> 00:52:24.880
But I mean I think you have to be very self-aware and a sense of self.

00:52:25.119 --> 00:52:25.679
Who are you?

00:52:25.840 --> 00:52:27.119
What is your identity?

00:52:27.440 --> 00:52:39.440
Once you figure that out, then you have to understand purpose, which I think has maybe has something to do with imposter syndrome, and that is what is your purpose?

00:52:39.599 --> 00:52:44.880
Because if you're if you understand what your purpose is, then maybe you wouldn't have imposter syndrome.

00:52:45.119 --> 00:52:52.159
So um I I think I think throughout our lives, we probably struggle with purpose.

00:52:52.559 --> 00:52:55.599
Because most people, if you ask them, hey, what's your purpose?

00:52:56.320 --> 00:52:59.760
I don't, I don't, I'm I'm not sure they really understand really know that.

00:52:59.840 --> 00:53:04.559
Well, I'm you know, I'm supposed to be a good dad, or I'm supposed to be a good mom, or I'm supposed to be, and that's that that's certainly a purpose.

00:53:04.639 --> 00:53:05.920
But what is your purpose on earth?

00:53:06.079 --> 00:53:06.800
I mean, what is it?

00:53:06.960 --> 00:53:09.760
I mean, I think you I think you've answered it and you like to help people.

00:53:09.840 --> 00:53:10.800
That's your purpose.

00:53:11.679 --> 00:53:12.320
Yeah.

00:53:12.800 --> 00:53:21.039
Um I I mean, I don't, I don't know what I I I really don't, I mean, I I don't know if I have an answer yet to what my purpose is.

00:53:21.119 --> 00:53:22.480
I'm trying to figure it out.

00:53:22.800 --> 00:53:27.039
Um uh I maybe my podcast is this purpose.

00:53:27.119 --> 00:53:32.719
I don't uh uh my purpose was ridiculous, but um, you know, I I I I maybe it is.

00:53:32.800 --> 00:53:39.840
I mean, I have had a lot of very interesting guests on this podcast, and they all I think have spoken to anybody who's listened.

00:53:40.159 --> 00:53:44.480
Um and so maybe that my purpose is to share my friends with the world.

00:53:44.639 --> 00:53:45.679
Maybe that's my purpose.

00:53:46.079 --> 00:53:50.480
I think uh so when we think about purpose, and you're right, a lot of people focus on that.

00:53:50.639 --> 00:53:51.360
What is my purpose?

00:53:51.519 --> 00:53:52.559
What is my purpose?

00:53:52.719 --> 00:53:58.559
Um, I think of what you talked about earlier when you got that phone call for the Pennsylvania.

00:53:58.880 --> 00:53:59.199
Yes.

00:53:59.440 --> 00:54:02.480
So you were shocked that they had your name, right?

00:54:02.559 --> 00:54:09.039
You were just doing your job, you were just living your life, you were just doing the next right thing for what was in front of you.

00:54:09.280 --> 00:54:20.400
Um I think if we just do that next right thing and we just live our lives and we just do the next right thing that's presented, like we're gonna walk in that purpose.

00:54:20.800 --> 00:54:22.159
And it's gonna it's gonna happen.

00:54:22.480 --> 00:54:23.599
It will evolve naturally.

00:54:23.920 --> 00:54:24.559
It will just, yeah.

00:54:24.960 --> 00:54:26.480
You cannot force it, that's for sure.

00:54:26.800 --> 00:54:27.199
Right.

00:54:27.440 --> 00:54:31.360
So it's just a matter of just doing what you do.

00:54:32.639 --> 00:54:36.320
Even even if you feel unqualified, like do it anyway.

00:54:37.519 --> 00:54:38.159
There you go.

00:54:38.320 --> 00:54:38.639
Yeah.

00:54:38.880 --> 00:54:39.599
There you go.

00:54:40.719 --> 00:54:41.039
Liz.

00:54:41.440 --> 00:54:43.199
I couldn't have said that any better.

00:54:45.920 --> 00:54:49.440
Um guys, I've really enjoyed this discussion.

00:54:49.519 --> 00:54:53.039
It it's a very difficult topic.

00:54:53.760 --> 00:55:00.159
It's it's like, hey, let's let's get let's just get vulnerable and let's just let's just dig to the bottom of our souls today.

00:55:00.320 --> 00:55:04.639
So I really appreciate you guys' courage to come on and talk about this stuff.

00:55:04.880 --> 00:55:07.519
Um it's it's not it's not easy.

00:55:07.679 --> 00:55:14.960
Now, I also have to make an apology because I asked Liz how to pronounce her last name, and I'm pretty sure I botched it, didn't I, Liz?

00:55:15.920 --> 00:55:18.000
You didn't botch it, you were close.

00:55:18.320 --> 00:55:19.039
Malmberg.

00:55:19.199 --> 00:55:19.920
It's Malenberg.

00:55:20.000 --> 00:55:21.199
I said Malmberg, didn't I?

00:55:21.280 --> 00:55:21.599
Uh huh.

00:55:21.920 --> 00:55:22.480
Damn it.

00:55:22.719 --> 00:55:23.599
That's okay.

00:55:23.840 --> 00:55:24.800
That's okay.

00:55:25.039 --> 00:55:27.920
Well, we'll keep striving to get better, huh?

00:55:28.000 --> 00:55:28.320
Yep.

00:55:28.559 --> 00:55:29.199
Thanks, guys.

00:55:29.440 --> 00:55:29.760
Thank you.

00:55:29.920 --> 00:55:30.559
Thanks, Sam.